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Your guide to the world series of poker: 15 indispensable tips

     It’s a long, hot summer in Las Vegas at the World Series of Poker – well, it’s 112 degrees outside the Rio, 58 degrees inside the Rio – so we are here to help you get through it:

  1. That really good parking space that you miraculously see in the distance always turns out NOT to be a parking space.
  2. First timers: Plan your bathroom trips accordingly.
  3. If you make it to Day 2 of an event, a shower and a change-of-clothes is not required but certainly recommended.
  4. I now register for all events in Level 2 – this guarantees that I did not lose chips in Level 1.
  5. Etiquette Tip I: When you lose a pot, say nothing. When you win a pot, say nothing. When you raise a pot, say, “Raise.”
  6. If you run into Allen Kessler on a 15-minute break and he wants to talk structure, you’ll have no idea where the 15 minutes went.
  7. When you overpay for an All-American Dave’s entrée, just consider it part of the house rake.
  8. If your wife calls to wish you good luck just before an event but she also mentions that the roofer says your house needs a new roof that will cost $17,000, withdraw from the event immediately.
  9. When running bad, it’s not a bad idea to start talking to yourself, because no one else really wants to hear it.
  10. Etiquette Tip II: I just don’t see the upside of flossing at the table.
  11. Do not approach me in the bathroom with a bad-beat story.

11(a). On second thought, do not approach me in the bathroom, period.

   11(b). And, actually, don’t approach me with a bad-beat story anywhere.

  1. If Todd Brunson is in a bad mood, steer clear of him; otherwise, he’s a sweetheart.
  2. Faith, hope, love – it can’t hurt.
  3. To avoid second-hand smoke outside of the Rio WSOP entrance, it is best to parachute directly into the Amazon Room.
  4. Don’t drink the water.

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